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Saturday 24th November 2012- The Goth, Newmills

What a night!  This was like gigs used to be back in the days before reality tv talent shows dominated the public's Saturday nights. 

The pub was really busy when I arrived, and I was stunned at an almost full house.  Then i spotted the birthday banners and balloons festooning the walls.  Aha!  That's why it's so busy.

Turned out it was Jarvie's birthday, and he had just turned 70.The crowd was mixed, though, and the man of the hour was a young looking 70, so I knew my usual mix of music would go down well. 

It did.  The pub was heaving for most of the night, and even the usual exodus to the "club" didn't put a dampener on things.  My last set included all my favourite rock songs, and a few new ones to boot.

Saturday 4th August 2012 - The Goth, Newmills

I look forward to coming to The Goth.  It's always a good night.  I seem to attract a crowd there, so I must be doing something right.  Maybe it's because I'm so down to earth.  I can't be doing with people who are snobby or who have an inflated opinion of themselves.  I'm always just me , and nothing more (Unless I'm doing the Adele tribute lol).  I talk a lot, and some of it even makes sense....

This night was a bit quieter than usual, and a few people left before the usual 11pm bus to the Valley Club. 

The only thing I would say is that I don't EVER let anyone use my mic or sing along with me at a cabaret gig. I'm not snobby, or up my own hoo ha, but sharing my mic is NOT an option.  I have had too many weeks off over the years from other people's colds, and that means I lose out on money - no sick pay in this job, you know.

So can I please ask that you sit back and enjoy my rendition of your favourite songs.  And please don't try to outsing me if you have been turned down when asking to sing. I have a microphone and a 400w PA system.  You will have a sore throat.

Anyhoo, see youz next time! 

Saturday 21st April 2012 - The Goth, Newmills

What can I say about the Goth that I haven't said before?  Great place, lively people. Things were a bit quieter than usual though, and I got a bit unsettled during the first set. 

The rest of the night was fine, however, as the table of girls next to me had a wee bit more to drink, and started to enjoy themselves.  As did I...

A good night, but not the best one I've had in the Goth.  Come on Girls!!!

Having said that, the manager told me it was the busiest Saturday in a while, as people had come to see me. Which is nice. Thanks.

Saturday 19th November 2011 - The Goth, Newmills

The Goth is my kinda pub.  The people are maybe a bit rough and ready but they like to have a good night.  They're not afraid of a bit of banter, and the odd refreshment. One particular group of girls are amazing - they know how to enjoy themselves, and I always have a good laugh with them. 

Requests for Lady Gaga and Patsy Cline at the end of the night were duly rewarded, and I had a personal private dancer at one point! 

Go there.  but mind you get the 11.05pm bus to the club. That's when the pub pretty much empties.


Saturday 14th May 2011 - The Goth, Newmills

My time travelling adventure continued into Saturday (see Friday 13th May at the Crusoe), and once again I found myself in a pub full of people who were out to have a good time, and they even applauded! This wee pub has been taken over by a very friendly guy called Keith, who explained to me that there was a huge group of girls away on a hen night that night, and told me not to expect a crowd.  He couldn't have been more wrong!  All through the night more and more people poured into the pub, and I had a dance floor full of people boogy-ing away at the end of the night.  I was meant to finish at 11.30, but took the time to give em a few more songs, seeing as they'd been such a good crowd.

I've been working on a fair few of Adele's songs, and I felt I could get away with trying them out on the people of Newmills.  They all went down well, and the pin dropping silence and open mouthed expressions on their faces during "Someone Like You" were a good sign. The huge applause and whistling at the end were a good sign too...

I hope Keith was impressed, and that the people of Newmills miss me enough to invite me back many more times..


Saturday 29th August 2009 - The Goth, Newmills

What more can I say about the Goth?  Every gig review I do for this great pub praises the pub, landlords and punters to "high doh". I am always welcomed with a "hello" and a bit of banter, and I feel at home straight away.  The crowd know what to expect - a bit of middle of the road, some dancy tunes, and a big dollop of rock.  I'd added in quite a few tunes since my last visit, so I hope they are not getting bored with me.....

Oh and I must mention the wonderful Charlie, who used a very interesting piece of percussion during "Glad all Over" - he hit a tray off the bar!  And Hi to UpsyDaisy! lol

If every week brought a venue like this I'd be a very happy Joanie.

Sunday 12th April - The Goth, Newmills

What a gig!  OMG!  I arrived at this crazy wee pub to find about 60 people out on the `randan`.  I had forgotten it was a bank holiday weekend. The wall of heat took my breath away immediately, and the noise level had to be heard to be believed. 

The very polite young men on the pool table finished up and put the table away soon after we arrived (Thanks guys), and then we got on with setting up.  The adrenaline was pumping as I was getting my laptop ready, and I had the shakes a bit.  Usually I feel really laid back when I come to the Goth - it's like going round yer auntie's.

There was no quiet warm up for me in the first set - I got right into it, as I think the crowd were warmed up well before I arrived! These gigs are a good test of my stamina - and my hair straighteners.... I looked like Krusty the Clown by the end of the night.  Must remember to put hairspray on next time.

I know the very song that gets this crowd going nuts - "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey.  I don't often do a song twice in a night, but I thought it'd be a good finishing number. 

No boos this time lol..... (For anyone who didn't see one of my previous reviews, the punters booed me for finishing one time)

for anyone reading this review on the noticeboard -




Sunday 15th February - The Goth, Newmills (5 til 8)

Another excellent Sunday afternoon at the Goth.  The usual crowd, the usual dancing and general good time was had by all.  I even took along a friend of mine who is a guitarist, and we played half a dozen tunes together.  I love what I do, but I also love working totally live (by that I mean no backing tracks - I ALWAYS sing live), so it was a privilege to be allowed by Liz to do something a little different.  Thanks to Liz and John for trusting me. 

Saturday 22nd November - The Goth, Newmills

My reviews for this pub always seem to begin with .."Another good night at the Goth"... and with good reason too.  This village know how to have a good time!  There were 4 birthdays on the night, but they were all in the same group, so the pubs wasn't totally full.  I think there were 2 girls and 2 boys celebrating, and celebrate they did!  Many many jugs of a cloudy looking concoction were consumed (despite my warnings that cloudy cocktails are NEVER EVER good for you).

The punters were well 'lubricated' by the end of the night, and I was actually BOOED!  Don't worry - they just didn't want me to finish.  I did an extra ten minutes and stopped, as I had a gig the following night.  This was me being boring though, according to the happy bunch.  So BOO! they did.

Sunday 12th October - The Goth, Newmills

Another great night at the Goth.  A Sunday can be a little quieter in most pubs in Fife, but there had been a party in the village the night before, so I guess a good few people were feeling the worse for wear.  As a result, there were only around a dozen people in the pub.  But boy, were they out to have a good night!  They enjoyed every song, and even got up to dance! 

I don't know if it's because I was tired after Saturday night, but I felt the most relaxed I had been in front of an audience for a good wee while.  Knowing you are appreciated and welcomed so well in a pub makes all the difference.  I even pulled out a few songs I haven't done in years - "Gloria" by Laura Brannigan and "Beautiful Stranger" by Madonna to name a couple. I even performed one of my latest additions - "Yes" by Merry Clayton (from the movie "Dirty Dancing") without the aid of a safety net - I had forgotten to bring the lyrics! 

Saturday 23rd August - The Goth, Newmills

Another roasty toasty gig at the Goth.  There was no special occasion this time, but I reckon the hens must have enjoyed themselves last time as quite a few of them had come along to see me again. 

There's always a good mix of people at the Goth, and they all arrive and leave at different times.  There's a bus at 11.05pm, and most of the younger people leave to go to Dunfermline or Valleyfield.  I no longer take the exodus personally. 

This page is always printed and put up on the board in the pub, so I'm going to take a leaf out of Derren Brown's book and try a bit of subliminal messaging.  Hopefully it will work. 

So anyway I'm very happy to come along to the Goth anytime, and Liz can feel free to

BOOK me ......................

AGAIN as......................

SOON and as......................

OFTEN as she likes! .........

I am now booking

for 2009.............

It's very subtle, eh?  I bet you hardly noticed it at all.... ;)


Friday 1st August - The Goth, Newmills

Well... when I arrive at a venue there are usually a few people in, and I have the chance to relax a bit before starting.  I sit and boot up my laptop, have a Jack Daniels, chat with Al and pop to the loo before setting up properly.  I start my first set with a few easy osey tunes, and work my way onto more dancy tunes by the end of the first set. 

Not so on Friday!  Liz had let me know there was a hen night expected, but I was still amazed to find around 40 screaming ladies in full flow, singing karaoke and drinking strange looking cocktails.  They had all apparently been out since 4pm (I arrived at 8) and were well up for a good night out.  The heat from the bar was stifling (all those hot bodies lol) and hit me as soon as I opened the door.  They were all wearing their own special hen night T-shirts with their names on them.  I was sure I'd remember loads of names, so I didn't write them down.  Unfortunately I am getting on a bit, and can only remember a few -

Jacqueline (the hen)






Sorry I can't remember any more.  If you want to add your name, drop me a line.  I don't want to get a row for forgetting anyone!  I know you'll be printing this out if you were there, so I better keep on your good side!

So - the hen night... I went straight into all my dance and pop stuff, slipping in a few older tunes for those who requested them.  The dance floor was very rarely empty, and everyone had a ball.  unfortunately the stripper didn't show, which was a bit of a bummer.  I wonder if he did, and looked in before running off with his tail between his legs lol.

So, all in all, a great night.  i was knackered and roasted alive, but I haven't had such a good night for a long long time...xxxx

Saturday 7th June - The Goth, Newmills

I always enjoy my visits to The Goth, even though sometimes it can be a bit quiet, especially if there is something else on in the town. I know, however, that even with a small audience I will be appreciated there.

On this occasion I had a 21st and an 81st birthday in the room, so it wasn't one of the quieter nights - at first. Unfortunately the gentleman who was celebrating his 81st was in to Scottish music so I wasn't his cup of tea. I apologized to him, but explained that the shortbread and tartan thing is just not my cup of tea.

When doing pub gigs where I feel comfortable, I tend to have a go at the new material I've been working on. I've also been going for material that suits my taste a bit more recently. It all appeared to go down well and I was even asked to do two of my tracks a second time. Usually I would refuse but as it was the birthday girl and the boss who asked, so what else could I do? I went for it. I aim to please....

This pub is one where a good part of the punters come from other towns and tend to go to their own clubs or home on the last bus. Unfortunately the bus timetable has been changed and there was a mass exodus at the end of my second set. I can't complain though as I was left with a good bunch of youngsters who seemed to be enjoying my rockier stuff and who were happy to have a bit of banter - which I'm usually happy to go along with..

Saturday 23rd February 2008 - The Goth, Newmills

Another good night courtesy of the excellent crowd at the Goth.  I can't fault them for enthusiasm, and I had dancers all night.  Excellent.

A big HI! to Liz and all the punters!

We were using my new LCD lights, and I must admit to being impressed with the quality of illumination.  My old cans looked dull in comparison.

Saturday 18th August 2007 - The Goth, Newmills

Well, my word for the night was bijou... I used it often as a description of the audience. I have to say that they were perfectly formed though. I received a smattering of applause after every song, we managed a good bit of banter and I even did a small request slot at the end of the night.

I seem to do this gig on the nights when someone is getting married, having a party or being buried... I still always get well received but would love to have a full pub to entertain. I still have to encourage anyone visiting Newmills to give this venue a chance, preferably when I'm there though.

Saturday 2nd June - The Goth, Newmills

The Goth is alright, you know.  Nothing fancy, mind you, but a good honest down to earth local pub, full of good hard working local people.

Any small town has a good community spirit, and I find that if there are any birthdays etc then everyone seems to go to them.  That was the case that night, as there were two birthdays in the town.  Neither of them was held in the Goth, though.

But hey, it wasn't a big problem.  While the crowd were not the biggest I've ever played to, they seemed to be impressed with what they got.  I had a good ripple of applause and even some `dancers`.  My three favourites were a trio of guys who I think had been out all day, bless `em.  They danced together, and got a bit play-amorous with each other during their dances.  Their friend was watching them, and remarked that he was usually in the same condition on a Saturday night, but on that occasion he was quite sober.  He took great pains to film them on his mobile phone, and joked that he'd be posting the film on youtube. 

Let me know if you did, kind sir, and I can share it with the people who visit my website too!

A big Hi to Liz, the licensee, who apologised for being elsewhere (there was some sort of line dancing thing on somewhere else)


I have recently found out that no, Newmills is not the Scottish Grand Old Opry, and the line dancing was at someone's party.  Phew, pardners, I though ah waz gunna have to dust off the ol cowboy boots.  Yeeha!

Saturday 28th April - The Goth, Newmills, Dunfermline

The noun Murphy's Law has one meaning:

humorous axiom stating that anything that can go wrong will go wrong
Also known as - Sod's Law

That just about sums up the beginning of the night at the Goth.  We had a bit of trouble with the traffic on the way to the venue - there was some sort of hold up before our turn off. 

Once we arrived, there was another disaster - No sound coming out of the speakers!  After checking all the leads and plugging in our emergency laptop (how prepared can you be?), we finally realised that the soundcard has a wee switch on it for digital/analogue sound.  It was at the wrong one.  Braw.

That over, Al then realised that there was no music coming out of the right hand speaker.  My vocal was coming through, but no music.  Double braw.  Turned out it was one of the soundcard leads sticking out a bit after being manhandled. 

Eventually everything went ok, and we had sound and vocal at around 8.45.  I was meant to start at 8.30.  Luckily the people were nice (as they usually are) and were quite appreciative during the songs.  After the songs, however, came the usual Fife applause (i.e. none).  I carried on regardless though (I know not to take it too personally) and at around 11pm the dancers' legs were - well - lubricated enough for them to get up on the floor and look like they were enjoying themselves.

A big Hi to Liz and John, who made me very welcome.  Oh and a great big Hey! to the bar staff, who got "in the groove" to Mustang Sally.